Mornings with a Fop
by Holly Unending
Summary: Foppish fun, a series of mornings with Ema Skye and Klavier Gavin. "Just another morning with my idiot boss." T to be safe. Klavier x Ema
1. My boss, the idiot

**A/N:** I love this pairing to death. Unfortunately, I've read just about every Klav/Ema fic out there and I needed my fix, so I just decided to write one myself. It was a speed write! 20 minutes…so be kind…

EDIT: Now multi-chapter! I hope you enjoy the following chapters as well.

**Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING. **Not even my house. Or the computer that I'm typing this on. … Okay, well maybe that. But nothing AA. (I haven't played the game so sorry if they're OOC!)

* * *

**Monday : My boss, the idiot**

"Detekivin! Wie geht's?"

I could feel ice creep over my whole body at the smooth sound of the German greeting. At least I assumed it was a greeting, I'm not bilingual and some people just aren't polite enough to translate.

"Speak English or shut up," I swirled around in my chair and crunched a Snackoo aggressively, refusing to look at the doorway. I was in a bad mood from waking up early _yet again_, goddamn alarm clock. _Why, oh why, did have to I fail my forensics exam and get stuck with this unappreciative fop of a prosecutor?_

"Ah, meine freundliche Fraulein. It's so good to see your cheerful face first thing in the morning!" Klavier Gavin ignored my death glare and swept past me to sit on my desk. And my papers.

"You're squishing my crime scene model," I informed him coldly, trying to shove him off with my foot. Unfortunately glimmerous fops are heavier than they appear. It's probably all that ego weighing him down.

He didn't seem particularly bothered by my treads digging into his thigh, instead choosing the opportunity to snatch my half-empty bag of Snackoos. It made a sad captive crinkling sound as my life force was tragically stolen away.

"Y…" I couldn't speak.

"Ja, meine Detekivin?" He sniffed the bag cautiously, eyebrows raised. "Hmm, smells a little strange."

"YOU JUST CROSSED A LINE, YOU FOOOOOOOOOP!!" I shouted, lunging across the desk for him. He just spun out of my grasp and began to recite the calorie count from the back of the bag.

"I'm doing you a favor, Liebe! These will wreck havoc with your schlank waistline, and then what will all your boyfriends do?"

"Shut up! Just because you have legions of girls who follow your everywhere you go, Mr. Popular, doesn't mean that we're all sluts!"

I beat mercilessly at him with a case file, sending papers whooshing around us like pigeons. Klavier was laughing at me as he held the glorious Snackoos just out of my reach. Laughing. Mocking the poor inept, unilingual, unglimmerous Detekivin! I lunged, and somehow caught him off balance-

For a second our faces were inches away from each other, and Klavier looked as stunned as I was. His eyes were very, very blue, I realized suddenly, like the color of the ocean reflecting the sky on an absolutely cloudless day. His hair fell perfectly down over his shoulder and shimmered blonde. His tanned skin practically glowed. For a second, I was very confused. _This gorgeous foreigner- what is he doing here? What is he doing wasting his time with_ me?_ Ahh, just look at the way he smiles…there's something about that smile… it's so…it makes me feel soo…_

The second passed.

"ANGRYYYYYY!" I clutched my bag of Snackoos, pulled myself off of him, and stomped back to my desk. _I'm not going to look at him. I'm not going to listen to him. And I'm not going to speak to him ever, EVER again!_

Klavier didn't get up off of the floor right away, which surprised me. When he did, he came and bowed his head in front of my desk. "My apologies, Fraul- detective. I did not mean to upset you, you just looked so sad and I wanted to see your face come alive again." I stared. _German prosecutor fop rock star glimmerous foreigner APOLOGIZING? Mind. Cannot. Process. _

Then he beamed up at me, apparently having forgiven himself. "So! How is the case coming?"

"Don't think I'm calling it even just like that, _Mr. Gavin._ You take a year off of my life every time you call me one of your stupid German names. I want compensation!"

He blinked. "Alright, Fraul-"

Snackooed.

"A-alright, detective. I'll take you out for dinner, how's that?"

"You're asking for another Snackoo? Why, I'd be happy to, Mr. Prosecutor!"

Snackooed.

"Hahaha. You've got quite an arm, meine Katzchen! Put it to work writing a case file and let me know when you're ready for that date! Oh, that one was closer, just focus a bit more and you'll hit me for sure next time. Auf wiedersehen, bis kann ich du in mein Armen wieder halten…"

I panted angrily for a long time after he was gone. Then I came to a startling realization: my body was much warmer than before he had come in, and the smooth sound of his German farewell had definitely gotten the blood flowing. At least I assumed it was a farewell, I'm not bilingual and some people say things I'm not sure I want translated.

* * *

A/N: Translations:

_Detekivin! Wie geht's?_ Detective! How are you?

_Ah, meine freundliche Fraulein._ Ah, my friendly girl/lady.

_Liebe _Love (term of endearment)

_schlank_ think/slim

_meine Katzchen _my kitten

_Auf wiedersehen, und ich kann du in mein Armen wieder halten. _Until we meet again, and I can hold you in my arms again.


	2. You translate into my dreams

**A/N:** I wasn't originally going to have this be anything more than a oneshot, but well… the ideas just kept coming. I hope you decide to stick around for more mornings with a fop of a boss

**Disclaimer:** I didn't become a billionaire and buy Apollo Justice in the time since the last chapter was uploaded. Thus, it is still property of CAPCOM. And I still haven't played it OTL SORRY

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**Tuesday : you translate into my dreams**

I didn't want to.

I _promised_ myself that I wouldn't.

_Ema, you shouldn't make promises lightly_, my inner Lana scolded me. I internally Snackooed her (she wasn't really Lana, after all) and gritted my teeth. _I don't have a choice. I just can't take it any more, this feeling of being in the dark every second of the day. _

"That will be 6.16," the female cashier informed me in a monotone, and I forked over the equivalent of three bags of Snackoos.

"Goddamn glimmerous fop," I muttered, ignoring the look I got from the cashier as I snatched the bag away and stalked out of the store.

And so I bought a German-English dictionary.

I raced outside just as the bus I needed to catch to the Precinct started to lurch away, but my the force of my rage- at myself and at my boss- propelled me through the doors just before they snapped shut. The bus driver raised his eyebrows at me. "Late again? This isn't usually where I pick you up, is it, Miss Morning Person?"

I shoved my bus card in his face and stalked to the back of the bus. I had to wake up _extra early_ to get to Barnes and Noble before the workday started, and as even the bus driver knows, mornings aren't my strong suit. I ripped open a bag of Snackoos and crunched away.

_Now, what is it that glimmerous fop always says to me? "Detekivin." Okay, I think I've got that one figured out. And "Fraulein", even I know that one. Uhhhm…crap. What is it he's always saying to me? Leemie? Liega? _I ruffled furiously through the pages of the accursed book.

There was no Liega, but there was a Liege: "cot or bed." That just didn't seem right. "If you're going to insult me, at least make it a real insult," I grumbled. Maybe I wasn't spelling it right. I started to read the foreword about pronunciation and spelling, and before I knew it I was out like I was sleeping on a luxurious Liege and not an unforgiving bus seat.

* * *

_Klavier Gavin was bending over me. "Ah, my beautiful Liege…how are you today?"_

_"I'm not a bed!" I sat up quickly. "So don't call me Leeg…that!" _

_He knelt down next to me and gently brushed a hand along my jawbone. There must be some weird thing pressure point there or something because I couldn't move at all, I could only stare into his blue, blue, blue eyes…_

_"Auf Wiedersehen, und ich kann du in meine Armen wieder halten," he whispered, and leaned forward until his warm lips met mine._

_"Mmm…"_

* * *

"Ick…Mr. Prosecutor, you're drooling."

Someone who was definitely not Klavier shouted at me. "Hey, I'm not the one drooling, Miss Morning." I awoke suddenly and realized the entire foreword of the my dictionary (as well as Aal through Blaugrau) was soaking. The driver chuckled at me from his seat at the front of the bus.

"Ugh! Whyjoowaykmehoop?" I mumbled incoherently, dragging my mouth across my sleeve.

"End of the line! You gotta get off here."

_Line? What line?_ I looked around me and found that I was still on the bus. "Wha- what time-?" I was already out of my seat, stuffing the dictionary into my bag, frantically checking my watch. _Nooo! I'm laaaate!_ My little nap completely left my mind. I dashed through the doors of the station, shouted "GoodmorningsorryI'mlatesirwon'thappenagain!" to the man at the desk, and plunged into my office.

My chair whirled around without me touching it, and there he was.

The glimmerous fop.

The rockstar prosecutor.

My boss.

"Ah, my beautiful Liebe!" He grinned at me and pushed his sunglasses up on his forehead. "How are you today?" Unfortunately, that greeting brought my nap back to the front and center of the stage of my mind.

Klavier Gavin.

Star of my dream- no, my _nightmare_. I could feel my eye twitching as my gaze traveled (without my permission, may I add) from his lips- his lips that had been so warm and perfect- to his eyes- blue blue blue eyes- and…

"Liebe? Was ist los mit dir?" He looked at me with concern. I tried to decide between fainting and screaming. "Meine Detektivin? Bist du krank? Oder habe ich etwas in die Zähne?"

_Screaming it is._

"Out! Get ouuuut of my office, you glimmerous fooooop! You- you- incomprehensible German! You creature of nightmares!"

He beat a hasty retreat (although his smile never left his face) and left me alone with a mountain of paperwork, a crushed model of a crime scene, and a soggy German dictionary. _Why, oh why,_ I lamented_, did I ever have to become a detective? And why did God invent mornings?_

But that wasn't the last morning I would spend with my glimmerous boss, and it wasn't the worst either. Little did I know that it was also far from the best.

* * *

**A/N:** Translations, yay! I won't translate things that were translated in the text, like _Liege _cot/bed.

_Auf Wiedersehen, und ich kann du in meine Armen wieder halten_ Until I see you again, and I can hold you in my arms again. (Dream Klavier is just saying what real Klavier said last chapter xD)

_Guten Morgen_ Good morning. Please tell me you knew this one…

_Liebe_ love (term of endearment)

_Was ist los mit dir?_ What's the matter?

_Bist du Krank? _Are you sick?

_Oder habe ich etwas in die Zahne?_ Or do I have something in my teeth?


	3. Invitations

**A/N:** Sorry the last chapter was so short and Ema-centric. D: Poor Klavier barely got in there at all, huh? AARGH this took me forever. I know where I want to go from here, but this chapter was just…empty. I needed something to happen. It ended up being longer than I expected, I put waaaaay too much effort into it. (dies)

**Disclaimer:** All characters belong to the almighty god game company **CAPCOM**. I haven't played it, etc etc etc.

**Edit: **Fixed a couple of glaring plot holes.

**Wednesday : Invitations**

I shuffled papers around on my desk without any real ideal of organization, just attempting to look busy. I really needed to go check out the crime scene again before doing anything else, but those idiots in Forensics were taking forever to analyze the evidence I'd already collected and it would be smart to know the results before I went. If it was me in there, I would have finished the tests days ago. But I wasn't in there.

"Guten morgen, Fraulein!" My door opened and Klavier set two cups of coffee down on my desk with a flourish.

"You know, some people knock."

"And some people say thank you when their boss brings them coffee." He flashed one of those stunning- I mean stupid, stupid is what I meant- grins at me and whistled a few bars. "It's black, so you can put in whatever your heart desires."

"Thanks," I muttered reluctantly, reaching for one. Considering how sleepy I was feeling, black was probably the way to go this morning. I grimaced and slurped some of it down._ Ahh, it's still hot. Scientifically speaking, that means he must have come straight from the coffee place. But he's not late, which means he purposely left time to go there. Which means he's been thinking of me all morning, and maybe even last night when he set his alarm… You stupid brain, that's not scientific! He probably just wanted coffee for himself and got me some on the spur of the moment!_ _And it doesn't make a difference to me even if it _was _on purpose!_

"Actually, I thought about calling you last night and asking how you wanted it, but it was so late that I was afraid you would figure out how to fit a Snackoo attack through the phone if I did."

I choked, dripping coffee down my front. I scrubbed at it with an evidence list from last week. "W-what? You- how do you even have my phone number?!"

Klavier blinked. "You don't have to look so surprised. You're my employee, of course your number was easy enough to find on file. And we're going back to the scene of the crime for a little more investigation today, I need my detective alert and ready to go!"

"Oh. I mean, of course you do."

Suddenly he leaned across the desk toward me, so that one of his honey-tan cheeks was practically brushing mine, and whispered, "Of course I do. But of course, I also want to know simply for…future reference. Because I care about you, meine Liebe."

I could feel the warmth radiating off of his body, could sense his cheek lifted up in a seductive smile, could have turned slightly and kissed him softly, just like in my freakish nightmare from yesterday. Couldn't stand the burning in my cheeks and the feeling that he was only toying with me.

I shot up so quickly I sent my chair spinning away behind me, and quickly shoved some papers into my bag. In reality, I didn't have the slightest clue of what I was grabbing, because something about being around _that man_ puts a lukewarm fog into my mind. Snatching up my coffee, I snapped, "Let's get going," and stalked out the door.

"Ah! Mach langsam, bitte!" I could hear him call out behind me, but I didn't hesitate.

My cheek was still warm from his, and the sensation took longer than my coffee to cool.

I crossed the street as fast as I could and stood impatiently in the shade of the bus stop. _Please come soon please come soon please come soon…_"There is no need for meine Detekivin to use public transportation." _Damn, he caught up to me. Must be those long legs._

"Mr. Gavin, the crime _took place_ at a bus stop. There's no faster way to get there."

"Ah, I'm afraid you have been misinformed, Fraulein Detekivin. Not only is there a much faster way to travel, but the bus no longer runs to that particular stop. It can hardly pick up passengers at a crime scene, after all."

"Fine, I'll walk." I was determined to avoid him for the rest of the day at all costs, even if that meant arriving at the scene long after he had finished up.

He chuckled. "No need. "

"But I've never- no way!"

"You haven't ridden one before? Don't be afraid, it's-"

"_I am not afraid._"

"Then ride with me, Liebe. It will be much faster." I had to be careful, or the beautiful melody of his voice would make me give in, just so I could hear it a little while longer. Grudgingly, I gave him credit for probably being a pretty good singer.

"_No. No, no, no!"_ _Not with _you.

"Ah, not even for these…?" I stopped, knowing even before I turned around what I would see:

Snackoos. Four bags of my precious, precious snacks. Mmmm, they did look good, and I could really, _really _use some this morning. Sometimes a girl needs chocolate, and sometimes she needs Snackoos.

_But does a girl ever need Snackoos from the glimmerous fop that is her boss?_

"Come now, Fraulein, don't discriminate against your beloved Snackoos," he grinned temptingly…and by that of course I mean tempting me to take the snacks. _I can't believe I'm considering this, but…_

I snatched them out of his hand and ground out a "_Fine_, I'll ride your stupid bike."Klavier positively beamed at me. "Wunderbar!"

"Glimmerous prosecutor with your smooth-talking," I muttered as I followed him to an extremely gaudy motorcycle, complete with his angular G trademark.

"Don't think about how you're going to look on this, Ema, just get on," I instructed myself.

He grinned and climbed easily over; I scrambled up after him and clenched my hands in my lab coat. "You're going to have to hold on, Fraulein," he said without being able to keep the humor out of his words, grabbing my hands and wrapping them tightly around his waist. I was pressed up against his back.

I squeezed my eyes shut and yelped as he gunned the engines and sped forward. I could feel his shoulders shaking as he suppressed laughter. "Don't let go of me, Liebe," he called back to me and we raced out of the parking lot. "Achtung, Baby!" The speed was incredible and exhilarating and _terrible. _

"N-nothing should be able to go this fast!" I whimpered, holding him tighter against my will and praying to somehow survive. _Please, God, I'm too young to die._ I felt like it would be far too easy to simply lose my grip and fall off the side to my death. Just when I thought I couldn't stand it any longer, I felt Klavier's hand against one of mine and he turned partway around to comfort me.

"Almost there, just hang on a little longer. Don't worry. I will never let you fall," his sapphire eyes sparkled reassuringly. As we slowed down near a suburban area, I was finally able to relax a little, almost forgetting who I was riding with- it felt good to hold someone like this. I had forgotten how _warm_ people were, and there was something about how broad and soft Klavier's back was that was comforting. I hadn't really hit it off with any of my co-workers, Lana didn't exactly live nearby, and, I realized, I was _lonely_. _But not lonely for Klavier Gavin! _I pulled away a little and in response he sped up, forcing me to clutch him tightly again.

"What are you doing?" I shouted helplessly. "This isn't a game, Mr. Gaviiiiin…" But I only caught a faint snatch of German, and my words were lost in the current of the wind we created. _I will never trust a prosecutor again!!_

The instant the Motorbike from Hell stopped moving, I tumbled off and staggered away. "I AM NEVER RIDING YOUR DEATH CONTRAPTION AGAIN!!" I shouted back at him as he finished parking. He looked disappointed and shouted something back which I promptly ignored, instead lurching away to look for someone who would know if anything had happened at the scene.

"Did anything else turn up since I was here last, uhm…?" I addressed a new-looking recruit with a charm pinned to his collar.

" OFFICER MEEKINS SIR!! NO SIR NOTHING TO REPORT SIR!!"

_Please…turn down the volume…_ "Did anyone think to check down the street?"

The policeman blinked. "SIR NO SIR!! We thought you might like to do the honors yourself, SIR!"

_So they were lazy. _If his first shot missed, it was probable that the bullet was somewhere in the surrounding area. "Okay, thanks sir- Uhm, Meekins." His enthusiasm was way too contagious. "I guess I should go check it out." Whatever, I'd still take boring over life-threatening any day.

I was barely three feet down the alley when a hand secured itself on my arm and pulled me into a tight embrace. "Pretty young girls shouldn't go wandering off," a silky male voice warned me. "This is not a freundlich neighborho_ooof!_" I couldn't see my attacker because I was pressed so tightly against his chest, but I had a pretty good idea of who it was- the self-satisfied way of speaking, the German accent, the cold medallion pressing into my shoulder, even the spicy sweet scent of his cologne. Still, one could never be too sure. _Hey, a little knee where it hurts won't kill him._

He staggered back against a brick wall and leaned against it for support.

"Oh, Mr. Gavin, it's you," I said in a falsely sweet voice. "I am so, so sorry, I had no idea." _That felt way too good._

"T-that was hardly called for," he choked ruefully. "_Heftige Fraulein._"

"That's just my defense mechanism against glimmerous fops who invade my personal space. It might be an allergic reaction."

"My apologies, I was unaware of your…disability."

"Thank you very much, I- wait a minute, it's not a disability! It's common sense!"

He seemed to have recovered, waving a finger at me with his usual genteel humor. "Ahh, but it _is_ a disability. It means that you cannot attend dinner and a concert with me Saturday as I had planned."

"That's how I- but you- _what?_ _When_ did you just decide this was going to happen?" I spluttered. _And does it count as asking me out if you do it in such a roundabout way?!_

"Well, obviously the plans are off now, Fraulein Detekivin," he said sadly, "I would never wish to make you ill or give you spasms of the knee like just now. I'm afraid I will have to take someone else; perhaps those beautiful girls in my fan club would be willing to assist on such short notice."

Yep, there was definitely a twinkle in his eye. "If you think I'm jealous and that I'll beg you to let me come, you are absolutely deluded, Mr. Gavin." I spun on my heel and started down the alley again.

I could hear his soft footsteps padding after me like a sleek tomcat and instantly an image of Kitty Klavier popped into my mind. I shook my head furiously to dislodge it, instead concentrating on looking for clues. "But Fraulein, you need to take a break from work! It will be fun, ja?"

"_No._ Are you too cheap to hire actual employees or something? You're just going looking for an excuse to stick me in a security uniform again, aren't you?"

"Ah, you were very cute in that uniform, Fraulein. It showed off your waistline."

"_WHAT?_"

"But that is not why I am inviting you this time. This time, you will be only a member of our joyful, enthusiastic audience." Klavier beamed at me. I glared suspiciously at him. _Did he actually compliment me? Whatever, it doesn't matter! He just wants to make _me _want to volunteer to be a security guard at his stupid concert._

"No."

"There is no need to be so obstinate, Fraulein. I've already bought you a ticket, it won't cost you anything but a little of your time."

I regret to admit that my resolve cracked just a little when I heard that. "Free?"

"Natürlich! I would never be so impolite as to make my date pay for one of my own concerts."

"Watch it! I am not your _date_!"

He just shrugged confidently. "If you insist." But he was wearing me down. Memories of being at concerts with my best friends ten years ago poured into my mind: dancing, laughing, the moving colors and collective adrenaline all around us. I could only imagine how that sweet voice of his would sound amplified in a microphone, lilted in song. And as a woman whose food pyramid consisted largely of beef ramen, chicken ramen, vegetable ramen, and Snackoos, I was not one to turn my nose up at _free_.

I gritted my teeth, unable to believe that I was accepting an offer from this insufferable _fop_ of boss. "_Fine._"

"I beg your pardon?"

"I said _Fine_, I'll go with you to your stupid concert."

He frowned and bent to pick something up off the ground with one gloved hand. "No no, I wouldn't want to force you to accompany me against your will. It is no trouble for me to arrange something with another Mädchen; even Herr Forehead may know someone who would be happy to attend."

"Don't push it," I snapped. "What's that you've got?"

Then his face turned positively coy. "I'll trade it to you for a kiss."

"What about my fop allergy?" I reminded him coldly. "The reaction tends to get stronger each time I'm exposed, you know."

"A hug?"

"I feel an attack coming on now…"

He chuckled, but also backed up a few feet. "It's all the evidence we need, Liebling: the second bullet." It was already dangling in a plastic bag from between two of his slim fingers, and I could feel my irritation turning into anger.

"It looks like you can even do my job, so why do you keep me around?" I demanded angrily. _I would have found that if he hadn't been distracting me! _"Just to humor me? You don't even need me, do you, you _glimmerous fop_?"

"Meine Leibe-" I could hear the bus pulling up on the other side of the wall; it drowned out anything else that stupid German might have had to say and gave me a sign. It was time to leave. I had meant to walk calmly away from him today, but somehow I ended up running.

The instant my front door closed behind me, I ripped my dictionary from my bag and started to rifle through it. _Meine, meine…_ "My, mine. Okay, so he's saying I'm his _something_." _Liebe. L-I-E-B-E._ I had no idea if it was going to mean _idiot _or _scientist _or something completely irrelevant like _learn_. But I was definitely not expecting anything like…

_Love._

Apparently it could be used in many ways- out of love for, love at first sight, be in love with, lovers- some of which sounded familiar. He's hasn't been insulting me, he's been calling me _pet names_?! I couldn't help it, I just started giggling. "That's, hahaha, that's not- hahaa- funny, Mr. Gahahahavin…" I laughed and laughed until all my raw energy was completely spent and I collapsed into a chair.

What was it about him? Was it the smirk on his handsome face? The way his eyes sparkled when he tried to make me jealous? Or the way he touched me so casually? What was it about Klavier Gavin that just gave me a terrible headache? I started to massage my forehead and was surprised to find my palms getting wet. Pulling back my hands, I realized I was crying.

_You ask me for a kiss, but your smile says it's just a game._

_I tell you I'm allergic to you, but I can still feel your arms around me._

_You call me your love, but you can't stop talking about 'those beautiful girls'._

_I say I can't stand you, but…_

**A/N: Translations galore**

_Mach langsam, bitte!_ Slow down, please!

_freundlich _friendly

_Heftige Mädchen! _Violent girl!

_Natürlich _Of course

_Liebling_ Darling

**Also: **This chapter had a lot more dialogue, so it was struggle for me to keep them in character. Please write to me if you notice any parts that bother you where they're really OOC!


	4. Lana's Investigation

**A/N: **Alright, the fourth chapter! I'm just going to plow straight ahead and go back to change things later, okay? Lana makes quite a guest appearance- can you guess who her husband is? ;) It should be extremely obvious seeing how I couldn't resist putting his name in. xD Man, I like writing Lana too much... Ohyes, **spoiler alert for case five in PW:AA! **Ohmyit'slong…6 pages in Word. O.o

**Disclaimer: **CAPCOM.

* * *

**Thursday : Lana's Investigation **

I looked at the clock through bleary eyes and blew my nose again. One in the morning, huh? _This is why I hate crying_, I thought vaguely to myself. _My nose is like Niagra Falls for the next freaking five hours._ It wasn't a particularly imaginative metaphor, I knew, but I wasn't feeling particularly imaginative.

Currently, I was feeling like a great big sack of _nothing_.

Some sort of children's thing was playing itself out on my television, oblivious to my discomfort, and for a few minutes my attention was stayed by a robotic samurai engaged in an epic battle. But then it was time for a commercial break, and _wouldn't you know it_, it was a commercial for a concert. Not the Gavinner's concert, but still- it led my train of thought right back around to Klavier Gavin.

My mind figured out that his first and last names could be combined to create _Klavin_, which sounded like a cleaning product, and then moved on to his other features. "No!" I told myself firmly. "You are _not_ going to let that glimmerous fop get under your skin _ever_ again! Now go to sleep!" Tossing myself over on the couch, I squeezed my eyes shut and concentrated on the sound of the TV. No matter what it was saying, as long as it was on I didn't feel completely alone.

But I was.

I sat back up. This was never going to work. I glanced guiltily at the clock again…it was still one am. Bouncing the phone in my hand, I wavered back and forth just like I'd been doing since I got home. _What if she yells at me for calling so late? C'mon, you know Lana wouldn't yell! But she might tell me to call back in the morning, and I can't wait that long- I have to go to work. _The thought of work with my boss made up my mind: I needed to hear my older sister's voice.

_Ring. Ring. Ring._

"Maybe she won't pick up," I muttered to myself, half hopeful and half worried.

_Ring. Ri-_

"Hello?" Lana's voice was crisp and perfect in my ear. It felt so good to hear her again that I had to blink back a wave of homesickness.

"H-hi, Lana… um, it's me."

There was a wave of background noise that sounded like a club and I could picture her setting down her sophisticated-looking drink and brushing her long hair out of her face as she listened. "Ema? What's wrong? Are you okay?" _Wait… it's one in the morning, but she's out and about?_

"Where are you? What about Uncle?"

"I went out for the night so he could have some time to just relax. Work's been hard for him lately. Anyway, I ended up finding someone…interesting to talk to. But that's not important- are you okay?" she repeated.

"I'm…fine. I think."

"Tell me about it, Ema." As usual, Lana got straight to the point. "Boy troubles?"

"It's- WHAT? LANA!"

"Oh, that's not it? Well, I tried. My prosecutor's sense _is_ out of practice."

"I- Well, he _is _a guy," I could feel her triumphant smile through the phone, "but he's my boss."

"Ah, I think I understand. Is he treating you badly?" I was a little surprised that Lana didn't immediately assume I had a crush on him, then I remembered _her_ boss when she worked for the prosecutor's office. Damon Gant had threatened, murdered, and blackmailed her and the people she cared about. It was more likely for her to associate a boss with anger than love.

"Yeah!" I blurted out before I could think of anything really incriminating to follow. "He taunts me all the time and tries to take my Snackoos and calls me pet names and tricks me into going to his concerts and on his death contraption I mean motorcycle and is always reminding me that he's an amazing bilingual rock star prosecutor!"

There was a moment of silence. "Ema, the only thing I could think to get him on for that is sexual harassment, and I don't think even Manfred Von Karma could have gotten a guilty." I leaned my forehead against the wall. "It sounds to me like he's genuinely interested in you."

"I…I know it _sounds_ like that," I groaned, "but he just won't stop teasing me and I can't stand it! It's like he's never serious!"

"Like Justin," she said out of nowhere.

I paused for a moment, in case that decided to suddenly make sense. It didn't. "What?"

"Justin, that boy who was in your class in third grade! He had the hugest crush on you, don't you remember? Wouldn't stop teasing you all year."

"Lanaaaa, it's not the same at all!"

"Why not?"

"Because he's way older than Justin! An adult! We're both adults, that's not how adults are supposed to act."

"Just because he's physically mature doesn't mean he's _emotionally_ mature," she pointed out. "In fact, he's probably never had a real relationship where both sides give honestly. He may not know how." I felt like I'd been beaned with the Blue Badger. Not only because she was kind of taking his side, but because what she said totally made sense. I'd seen him tease his fans before, and they all reacted with a level of screaming inaudible to human ears- jumping up and down, blushing, or trying to hug him. I realized that Lana was still talking and tuned back in. "…your reaction."

"Sorry, what was that?"

"I said that's he's probably just looking for your reaction."

"But I've tried _everything_! I've said yes, I've said no, I've tried to be polite and I've tried to ignore him and I've tried to fight back, I… _I just don't get him._"

"What did you say his name was?" Lana asked suddenly. I recognized the tone of her voice, it was her The Pieces Are Starting to Fall Together No Thanks to the Stubborn Witness voice.

"I didn't. But it's Klavier Gavin." I answered reluctantly.

"Gav- what does he look like?"

"Why, do you know him?"

"Know him? …No, we've never been introduced."

" …Uh, blonde hair, blue eyes. His chin is about at the top of my head, so scientifically speaking, he's taller than me by at least three inches. His skin is really tan, which makes his eyes stand out, and he always has this overconfident grin on his face. I guess he looks German. Oh yeah, he loves to talk in German to confuse me, but I bought a dictionary to translate and it turned out that he was actually calling me his love, but…" Somehow I ended up telling Lana everything. I talked and talked and talked about that fop until I was tired of my own voice. I told her the things I hated about him- hated so bad that sometimes I thought I could live out the rest of my life happily if he became a paranormal photographer and moved back to Germany forever- and the things that I, well, _loved_ about him. How sometimes I froze up because half of me wanted to press my face into his chest. The certain way the corners of his mouth would curve when he was really into taunting me. How his slim fingers pulled at his hair when he was thinking, or moved nimbly across the guitar strings, or darted in and out of my Snackoos before I realized what was happening.

And when I had used every word I could think of to describe him (including, of course, glimmerous and fop), so that Lana would have the same frustrating, contradictory picture as me, I stopped. I took a deep, shuddering breath, and waited for her to speak.

And she knew I was waiting, so she hesitated.

"I think…"

I sat on my couch with my chin propped up in my hands, numbly watching the seconds on the clock drip past. _Three…two…one… it's three am._ _It's three in the morning and the only thing standing between me and a great night's sleep is that my sister just told me I'm in love with my boss._

"'I think you're in love with him,'" I whispered to myself, quoting her, trying to imitate the gentle tone that she used and the soft, certain way she said it. It came out pathetic and I cringed.

_What's so wrong with being in love, Ema? Love is beautiful._

_What's wrong with it is that he's my boss! And even if he _wasn't_ my boss, even if he was just some hot German guy I met on the street, he's still…_him._ He still made me yell and cry and worry and believe I was going to die via motorcycle._

I didn't bother pretending that I didn't think he was hot anymore. There's a remarkable clarity that hits around three in the morning when you're thinking about love. I replayed my conversation with my older sister again and again in my head.

_What did you say his name was?_

_Gav- what does he look like?_

_Know him? … No, we've never been introduced._

She had sounded a little strange, like she was on the verge of a lie. A terrible, terrible thought hit me then- _Does Lana know Klavier?!_ Because I had no idea what she would tell/do to him if she did.

* * *

**Three hours earlier.**

Klavier leaned over the counter and smiled winningly at the barista. "Hello there, Fraulein. Can I ask you for a favor?"

Her cheeks flushed and she seemed to have difficulty remembering the English language, but she nodded. Klavier chuckled. Excellent, a fangirl. He placed his order with the most charming grin he could manage, and watched in satisfaction at her wide eyes as he downed it in one gulp. "T-that's a lot of…alcohol, Mr. Gavin!"

"I'm drowning my sorrows," he chuckled. "Perhaps you could help."

Her whole face was the color of Ema's necktie. "I- I- I- I'd love to!! What's is- I mean, what are you sad about?"

He lifted his freshly refilled glass to her. "I'm sad that we're not alone right now, Frauelin."

A middle-aged barista hunched down next to the gibbering first. "Girl troubles?"

"Something like that."

"Tell me about it, honey. Trust me when I say I've heard 'em all."

"You've never heard Ema Skye," he laughed and took another drink, knowing he looked dazzling. But if he'd been paying less attention to himself and more to those around him, he'd have noticed a woman in her late thirties sit up suddenly and turn her piercing gaze in his direction.

When the conversation turned again, she decided to act.

"I'll take over from here, thank you." The woman's eyes cleared a path for her as she abandoned her drink to stride gracefully behind the bar; her long red scarf flowing behind her as she walked. She picked up a nearby apron and tied it on, coolly flipping over a page on the pad tucked inside one pocket. No one dared to question why a barista on break would have been dressed like someone out for a night on the town. "Anything else?"

"How about you join me for a drink?" She was considerably older than him, but still attractive in an icy sort of way. He wondered how warm her chocolate brown eyes could get.

"I'm happily married." Her ring chimed abruptly as it knocked against the marble counter. Klavier's seductive grin didn't leave his face.

"Then what is a beautiful lady like you doing out all on your own tonight? Doesn't seem so happy to me. Or is it a crime to have a drink with a young man who could help you forget your troubles?"

"What about your girl? Ema Skye?"

For a moment his face was hidden as he took a swig of his drink. "Forget about her, Liebe. She isn't here, now it's just you and me-"

"She's hardly trouble if you can throw her away so easily, wouldn't you agree?"

His eyes narrowed. _She's not talking to me like a barista to a rock star in a public bar. She's talking to me defense attorney to prosecutor. It's like…she's building a courtroom around us. _He took another drink. "You think Klavier Gavin isn't man enough to handle you? I was hoping for a little more pleasure and less work tonight, but it looks like the heat's turned on without my permission. Achtung, Baby!"

"There's no need to get so worked up. Just tell me about her."

He chuckled. "You'll excuse me if I don't feel the overwhelming urge to confide in you."

She leaned back. "And why not? You're hardly likely to get a more honest or useful opinion than that of a married woman such as myself."

He paused. That was actually true. Who better to give him a Fraulein's perspective than another Fraulein- er, Frau- and who knew what any other girl would tell him? _This_ woman at least was not a fangirl, that much was obvious. "Okay, Fraulein. You win. Advise away, but if all the talking makes you thirsty I'm keeping the seat next to me open, ja?"

"Hmn. Are you going to tell me more about her?"

A shrug. "What do you want to know?"

"What does she look like? What's her job? How do you know each other?"

"Just the facts, ma'am? You're quite the…investigator." Another drink. "She's got long brown hair that she wears part up in a ponytail. Her eyes are…err, angry."

"You don't remember what color, do you?"

"I gaze into a lot of Fraulein's eyes, but I'll be sure to remember yours-"

"What does she wear?"

_Damm_, _sie macht kein Spass. _"A lab coat, tan pants, red necktie, nice-fitting green vest. Very nice-fitting."

"Her job?"

"Eating Snackoos, one would think. Although occasionally she does manage to investigate crimes, which is her real job. Before you ask, that's also how we know each other, which brings us to the end of your questions- if you don't have any advice now, how about something else…?"

"You don't deserve her."

He sat back, eyes wide because whatever he was expecting, it wasn't that. "Harsh. Why do you say that?"

"You don't really love her. Maybe you _want_ to love her, but some part of you still believes that in this adult world, you can get by with acting childish. As much as you want to deny it, she's not a little _Fraulein_ anymore. Could you forgive yourself if you knew you made her cry?"

For once, Klavier had nothing to say. Into the silence in the courtroom she had built around them fell the sound of a cell phone, bringing back the whole bar and city. It must have been around one am, and the crowd was thinning out in anticipation of rising early for work. The brown-haired woman removed her phone from her purse, looked at the caller ID, and pulled her apron off. "You'll excuse me."

His eyes followed her to the door, but his thoughts followed a different brown-haired Fraulein. "Kein Problem, Fraulein Eis," he lifted his glass to them both and downed the rest. "Barista! Could I trouble you for a refill…?"

* * *

The bed creaked as Lana's husband sat up. "You're home late."

"I know. I was having a sordid affair with a much younger man." She slid into bed next to him.

"Hmmn. You just point him out to me next time he's in these parts and we'll have a real shoot-em-up at high noon."

"Ema called. I'm worried about her."

He finally opened his dark eyes and looked at her, rubbing his five-o'clock shadow with one hand, the other arm slung around her shoulders. "You want to saddle up your steel steed and mosey on down for a visit, I take it?"

"I thought it might be good to check up on her…or maybe she doesn't want her sister interfering. What do you think I should do?"

He thought about it, then plopped back down on the pillow, eyes firmly shut. "Can't saddle your horses till' the mornin' anyway."

"And this horse, no matter how much I wish otherwise, has to be saddled by someone else." She could feel his quiet laughter warm against her neck.

"Sweet dreams, Bambina."

"Goodnight, Jake."

One happy couple and one not-so-happy not-quite-a-couple drifted off to sleep in LA.

* * *

**Translations for the multitudes**

_Damm_, _sie macht kein Spass. _Damn, she's no fun.

_Fraulein Eis_- Miss Ice/Icy

_Kein Problem_- used here as "you're excused"

**A/N: **Apparently they didn't go to work on Thursday. xD LOL I think I'm gonna split Thursday up into two parts. And what about Lana? Will she really come intervene?! No one knows. Not even me.

…

shot


	5. No, it's not Groundhog Day

**A/N:** How…HOW HAS IT BEEN SO LONG SINCE I UPDATED?! I really am sorry. For some reason I've been writing backwards from the ending, so it should pick up from here. This chapter seems short, and screws up my days of the week. Sorry again. brick IT'S THURSDAY AGAIN IN EMA-LAND

* * *

**Thursday (Again): No, it's not Groundhog Day**

"Today I will prove you wrong, Lana," I announced triumphantly as the bus screeched to a halt in front of me. The doors folded open like subjects parting before their victorious queen and I stepped regally inside. And forgot that there were three steps instead of two, making a not-so-regal descent to the floor.

Recovering quickly, I flashed my bus card at the driver, who was regarding me with open amusement. "Miss Morning actually got up on time for once, eh?"

I gave him my best "Miss Morning has a name, thank you very much, it's Miss Ema Skye, head Detective and future forensic investigator" smile.

_I don't have to be a queen to not fall in love with a glimmerous fop of a prosecutor_, I told myself (much to my confusion, that was not a very well-constructed sentence. Scientifically speaking.) I ripped open a bag of my favorite snack and started to crunch determinedly. _First, list the facts._

_Klavier Gavin, male, age 24, is my boss._

_He is possibly German, and at least has a fake German accent and knows words like Achtung! __He also said he wanted to hold me_(Erase erase erase)

_He has blonde hair that falls past his shoulders and __beautiful_(erase erase erase)_ blue eyes._

_He is part of a band called the Gavinners._

_He is a prosecutor._

_He really, REALLY likes to bother me._

_I don't think he likes Snackoos, which is a definite minus._

_But his smile is a plus WHAT AM I WRITING?! _

Thankfully the bus had come to my stop by then and I was able to put my list of "facts" out of my mind. I stomped past the security guard and into my office, where I plopped down in my chair right away and pulled out my notepad.

_Note to self: stop thinking in German. And stop thinking about Klavier while you're at it._

_And get a lot more sleep tonight._

I was somewhat regressing to my 16-year-old habit of writing down anything that seemed important, but this was a special case.

"Frauuuuuuuleeeeein Deteeeeekkkiviiiin!" My door crashed open and I practically killed myself trying to leap out of my rolling chair. Rolling chair + sudden movements badidea_ is the next thing going in my notebook, I can tell you that._

"Geez- don't people _knock_ in Germany?! You scared the crap out of me!"

Klavier winced. "Ach, please don't yell…my head…besides, I did knock, several times. And I called your name. I even folded a page of the sheet music from 'Guilty Love' into a paper airplane and threw it through your window since you'd locked your door, but then an officer who was passing by kindly broke in for me and-"

"Great, I really don't ca- _What?_ You busted my lock?"

"If you weren't deaf because you eat Snackoos till they come out your ears, perhaps you would have heard me. Is that also how you missed Mr. Right knocking on your door?"

"Mr. Wright was here, why didn't you tell me? I want to see him!"

"That was…metaphorical, Fraulein. I'm sure Mr. Right will cross paths with you again, hopefully when you are not gorging yourself to compensate for your lack of forensics opportunities."

"WHAT was that, FOP? Mr. Wright knows the real me and he's too cool-headed to care how many Snackoos I eat."

"Well, ja, he would have to be very cool-headed indeed to be your Mr. Right."

"What?"

"_Was?"_

"Okay, here's the rule of the day: No German. No busting my stuff. And no more confusing me. Why are you here?" I crossed my arms and glared up at him.

"That is more than one rule, Fraulein," Klavier pointed out, playing a few bars of air guitar to accentuate my failure as he seated himself on my desk (and almost my Snackoos).

"And no air guitar, thank you, almost forgot that one. _Why are you here?_"

"As I tried to shout through your door, I need the case file. Unfortunately, my dulcet tones fell on woefully deaf ears, leaving me stranded outside my Liebe's door with my heart all torn to-"

"Hey, what's rule number one?" _I don't care how awesome you look draped across my workspace, I'm _not _in love with you!_ I scribbled down in my notebook. "Ix-nay on the oddam-gay erman-gay."

"It is hardly proper for such vulgar words to emanate from such a delicate young woman, even in Pig Latin. Ah, Fraulein, if you could detach yourself from your memoirs for a moment and fetch me the case file?"

"I'm not some kind of dog. The verified copy was faxed over this morning, go get it yourself." But I did close my notebook, resigning myself to thinking the words with intensely intense…intensity. I was just intensely- I mean really focused. With intensity. (This is my excuse.) _I'm not in love with you._

"Crime scene model?"

"You're sitting on it. Again. My desk is not a throne, O Almighty Fop of Rock." _I AM NOT in love with you!_

"Evidence neatly labeled?" He fiddled with some of my papers.

"Stop it, you're screwing up my organization. And of course it's labeled. Even though I think that's technically your job," I grumbled. _Not, not, not, not, NOT in love with you!_

"Organization…? Your desk is an affront to the word 'organization'. But let bygones be bygones, are the witnesses prepped?"

"I'm not in love with you!"

"…" He stared at me with his mouth dangling open and pale eyes wide, then recovered (waaay before me, sadly). "Ah, Frauelin, you have shattered my heart."

"No! I didn't just_ say_ that!"

"Sorry to disappoint you, Fraulein Detekivin, but ja you did. The sound of it was like the engine cutting out on my motorcycle when I am on my way to a rock concert- tragic."

"I was just- I mean I- I…" _C'mon Ema, think think think! _"I was…talking to someone behind you!"

"Oh ja?" He turned around, Gavinners pendant swinging- narrowly missing my eye- and then turned back with an even more puppy-like expression than before. "Poor man. I doubt he will ever find it in his crushed heart to love again."

Indeed behind him there was conveniently a young detective staring right at me.

"Actually, I would say he's more, um… weirded out than crushed." Klavier hesitated so I grabbed my chance and ran with it. "You see, he's just confused… I've been denying it for so long, but we're better off apart. He's been telling me but I just wasn't ready to- to accept the horrible truth that we're not soulmates after all!" The detective edged around the corner as I spoke, and I suspected that once he was out of sight he would begin to run and not stop for quite a while.

_Yessssss. Bullet: dodged. Price: pride. _

"Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha…"

"Something _amusing_, Glimmy Boy? Other than your face?" _Ah, childish. But how could I resist?_

"Childish, Fraulein Detekivin, most childish. Let's leave the arguments up the lawyer here, shall we?

"Huh?" CRINKLE. I ripped open a bag of snacks and played nervously with one edge as I waited for the blush to leave my face. _This is my last bag, I really shouldn't break into it yet._

"The Detektiv you just indicated does not in fact work here, and is visiting on sabbatical from a precinct on the east coast. As his flight just came in last week, it is highly unlikely that you formed a relationship in this time."

_Well, crap. _MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH.

"And if we can indeed agree that you were not speaking to someone behind me, then the only logical explanation is that you were speaking to me, the only other person within earshot. Correct?"

"But-"

"Don't protest, Fraulein, you don't have anything to follow that up with anyway. Considering the situation we were in- and by this of course I refer to discussing work agenda- there was no reason for you to explain any sort of feeling. The fact that you would choose to bring it up leads the court to believe that you are at least worried _I _am in love with you. And based on your tone of voice, defensive rather than logical, I must conclude that this was an unrestrained outburst meant only for yourself, in pure denial of your feelings for a certain rock go- Ow!"

"You- you just shut your German mouth right now!" I blustered onward before he could come back with something like _If you couldn't understand what I was saying, it was due to chemical imbalances in your brain! I was speaking English!_ and continued angrily, "There's no need to go reading so deeply into it! You- you and your "prosecuting" and your "hog" and your "ja" and your "air guitar"!! You're so glimmerous, I don't understand how _anyone_ likes you!"

"I don't believe "air guitar" needed "air quotes", Frauelin. It was a nice touch though." I took aim, and... "Ow. That _wasn't _a very nice touch," he said ruefully, rubbing his arm after yet another direct Snackoo.

"Ooooh, you think you know everything, don't you? But everything you just said- there was no evidence for it at all! It really, really makes me mad. You think you can just go around accusing people without any evidence to back it up?! That's ridiculous! I'm the one who wins these cases, behind the scenes, with _real science_ for your glimmerous arguments, and I don't any of the credit or respect I deserve!"

His eyebrows pulled up into delicate arches as he regarded me with wide eyes. "Hmmm. Is that so?"

MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH. If I concentrated on munching, maybe no more stupid words would come out of my mouth than had already fallen to the mercy of my foppish boss.

"…"

"…" MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH. _C'mon, c'moooon! You can just go back to talking about the crime scene now! Oh nooo, I know that thoughtful look on your face. In any language, it translates into BAD.  
_"So if I can prove it scientifically, there'd be no problem, right?"

I choked. "Prove- you want to try to prove to me that I love you? Are you crazy?!"

"Ja, why not?" He shrugged, smirking.

For a second I was literally speechless, then I crossed my arms arrogantly. "Ha! Sure, go ahead and try! If you're _really_ scientific about it, there's no way you'll turn up anything."

"Achtung, Baby! Now you're feeling the fire that is my music- The prosecution is ready to rock'n'roll!"

"No one said anything about your music, stupid fop! Now get out of my office!!"

"Ach! Hey, no Snackoos! _Where is my case file?_"

"Go ask someone else, I'm busy!"

"It is not nice to lie, Fraulein! You're clearly not doing anything!"

"I said…get…out…geeeez, you're heavy!"

"Pleasure, but a fleeting melody- now through the air I fly…"

"And stop singing!"

"Ah ha ha…"

And so our little war of love officially began.

* * *

**A/N: **I have so many people to thank, please bear with me! Ah, the deranged chapter five. At the end this time (finally) I'm going to thank all you awesomely wonderfully fantabulously crazily super special awesome people who have reviewed. Sorry it took me this long.

SyberiaWinx: A billion thanks for the first review and convincing me to add more chapters!

Auryn Rei Evroren: ;; A super-kind compliment! Thank you!

Concetta: Wow, a really detailed review, thanks x a thousand! I'll try to keep writing with your suggestions in mind. Love your style

KaleidoStarMoon: Thanks for convincing me not to scrap Wednesday! I'm actually happy with the direction it's going now. Also…Kaleido Star is an addictive show. xD

paintedbynumbers: O.O …wow. Thank you so much for taking the time to write such a long review!! Alright, where to start? taking notes Fire Emblem MewMew also commented on my Klavier's OOC use of German, so I'm going to cut him back to just the basics you mentioned. And it was really helpful because I hadn't used any rockstar references. fail I was so happy to get your review

Kyra Fawxe: xD Drunk!Klavier was way too much fun to write. And good job, you noticed the "Fraulein"! I was originally going to have him call her something else after that but…I didn't know what. xD "Frau" (woman) would be more appropriate, but it's rude to call someone just "Frau" and he didn't know her name. I wanted to save "Liebe" (love) for Ema only, but I think it slipped in there once. Hey now Klavy, don't flirt with a married woman. D

Lanaroolz: O-oooooh. ./. She said… "by far the best"… dies I need more ways to say Thank you!!

Ohhh my, this is getting too long. / Anyway, many hoooooooooj thanks to Stormy1696, the blackdash, OneMorePerson, Angst Lover, EdwardsSoul101, Fire Emblem MewMew, and Sanded Silk too and anyone I missed!! Thank you to all of you, every time I read your reviews you help me to better shape my Klavier and Ema!


	6. TGIF

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* * *

**

A/N:

A little Christmas gift from me to you! This is the first part of Friday, the morning part. Sorry that it was so long between updates, _really. _I mean it. Ah ha ha, by the way, my Christmas list has reviews on it… -brick-

* * *

**Friday : TGIF (That Glimmerous Idiot Fop)**

The timer went off.

Klavier turned around from the stove to stop it, and I could see that he was wearing my pink apron (a gift from Lana, thus far unused because I was not known for using my kitchen for anything more complicated than heating a TV dinner, and that hardly required cooking attire). He smiled dazzlingly at me in that gentle and sweet way he had when he was feeling like the world was made just for him.

Disturbingly, I smiled back. _Must be getting sick._

His hair was kind of pulled back into a twisted ponytail to keep it out of the eggs he was scrambling. It was a little weird, to see him so casual, so relaxed, so absolutely at home in my kitchen. It was also kind of nice- if nice could describe the warm feeling spreading through my chest. It felt disconcertingly like someone was incubating my heart, I thought.

The timer went off again.

Klavier looked a little puzzled, but switched it off and cracked another egg into the pan with a cheerful little shrug._ I can't believe how long his fingers are, _was all I could seem to think. They moved so easily and quickly, deftly splitting the egg. The yolk slid cleanly out of the white shell- it looked so easy to break- but he did it so well, it didn't even seem like something breaking.

_Geez…Is this some kind of twisted metaphor…? I didn't think those existed in real life. _

The timer went off _again._

Klavier looked a little puzzled, but switched it off and cracked another egg into the pan.

The timer went off- _Man, _it was annoying! Why couldn't the world just leave me to watch Klavier in peace!? Now that I thought about it, that timer had been going off for quite a while. And most uncharacteristically, my chef hadn't said anything annoying. Wait, "my chef"? That wasn't right, was it? That wasn't what I usually called him. No, it was something…ruder…?

Huh. Strange. Who cares? He's mine either way.

The stupid timer continued beeping.

Klavier picked it up and hit it against the counter, frowning. "Fraulein, I think your timer _ist kaputt._"

It beeped even louder and-

I woke up to the scientifically annoying sound of my alarm, which was apparently beeping for the eighth time. I shouted something along the lines of "Wherehuhthefireguh?!" and flailed around momentarily before realizing it was my alarm. My bleary eyes slowly took in the red numbers: 7:50.

I was _soooooooooo_ LATE.

Fling self out of bed- _do not think about dream- _brush teeth like a madwoman, now I look like a rabid animal, if that isn't disconcerting- _do not think about dream_- cram nearest edible substance into mouth- _do not think about dream- _okay, that wasn't edible seeing as it was the television remote, try again- _do not think about dream- _out the front door WAIT A MINUTE CLOTHES- _do not, not, not, not think about your dream, Ema Skye, if you value your sanity!_

I staggered up to the bus stop just as the bus began to pull away. "Wait, wait wait wait wait, you stupid fop- I mean bus!" I hollered at it between gasps of frigid air, my lungs burning. Shockingly, it actually obeyed. I stumbled forward a few more steps to catch up; I lost my balance on the icy sidewalk a little but managed to grab onto a nearby light pole for support. The bus doors folded open to reveal the bus driver staring down at me with mild amusement.

"Just one sec," I panted, digging through my bag for my bus pass.

"You getting on sometime this Friday, Miss Morning?"

I glared up at him, opened my mouth to reply, and-

It hit me, quite aptly, like a bus. Friday.

I wasn't supposed to go into work today.

I was supposed to testify.

At the municipal court.

At _nine._

"_Not getting on,_" I ground out through my teeth in such a way that I could actually see through the window I'd made a kid start crying.

_Good. _

_Little brat probably deserved it._

_…_

_Okay, no, that was mean. I should go and apologize._ But it was too late, the bus had pulled away for real after one last skeptical look from the driver. Sorry kid, I apologized mentally. For all the good that did. If mental apologies worked, there wouldn't be murders and then I wouldn't have a job.

"Oh yeah, my job," I muttered, checking my cell phone clock. I still had about an hour before I had to be at the courthouse, and I was all ready to go. "I could have slept in," I said regretfully and sat myself down on a bench. I could feel the ice melting beneath me and really hoped I wouldn't have a big wet patch on my butt when I got up. Oh, the fop would just _love_ that, wouldn't he? I sighed and shifted a little, but was too lazy to move. Overhead, the pale blue sky was slowly being eaten up by storm clouds. I waited.

And so, that is how I came to find myself at the bus stop _on time._

Start building your bomb shelters, people-

The apocalypse is coming.

* * *

By the time I arrived at the courthouse, I had managed to shift practically all of the blame for my bizarre dream squarely onto the shoulders of a certain fop. And as such, it would be only his just desserts if I were to, you know, give the defense a little helping hand, right? I swerved away from the Prosecution Lobby and entered the Defense Lobby instead.

"Hey, Apollo, you might be interested to know…" I stopped abruptly as my gaze locked onto all-too-recognizable azure eyes in a warmly tanned face. He broke off his conversation with a rather familiar-looking young boy and smiled dazzlingly.

"You're in the wrong lobby, fop."

"So are you, Fraulein."

"I'm on the side of justice," I sniffed. "Justice has no lobby."

"Very well, however today Fraulein Justice is scheduled to testify for the prosecution, whose lobby is on the _other _side of the courtroom."

"I'm here because of a certain foppish boss who is making my life unnecessarily stressful!"

"Ah, but _I _am here because of the free-flowing generosity of my heart, Liebe."

"Which means…what, you're selling drugs? Don't you have anything better to do?"

He feigned hurt. "I am acting as translator for this gentleman you may recognize as Machi, a perfectly legal and commendable job thank you very much."

"Huh. If _you're_ doing it, I have my doubts."

"Such hostility so early in the morning," he shook his head with a sad little smile and wove a strand of hair through his fingers.

"I'm always hostile in the morning," I grumbled, "since that's when I have to deal with _you._"

"I do not understand." He smiled pleasantly at me, the same smile he gave me while making eggs. …_No! I had managed to repress that stupid dream all the way here and now- my day just got even worse! I hate Fridays!_ "I must deal with a hostile Fraulein every morning, yet I find it the highlight of my day. You would never see such a gloomy expression marring _my _face."

"The highlight? And _hey,_ my face isn't _marred_!"

"Ahh, compared to the light of your beautiful smile, it is," he said in mock sadness.

"Oh, um, thank y- _don't mock me, you fop!"_ I corrected myself just in time. _I can't believe I fell for that! Beautiful smile, my-_

"Ach, your words make it plain to me that you wanted to hear me say your smile is beautiful. Expect to see it on the court record in your trial of love," he laughed airily. Machi smiled. I had a feeling he had about zero clue what was going on and was just cruising with his antenna set to Mimic Fop- Try to Appear Normal. His first mistake was in assuming someone like Klavier Gavin could be anything like normal, of course. It was also a shame his emotion radar didn't pick up on my Extreme Hate For Glimmerous Fop- Must Kill vibes.

"Now listen here, I have had an awful day so far and-"

An overenthusiastic bailiff I recognized as Meek Mike…er no, Mike Meekie… Mikey Meek? Okay, an overenthusiastic bailiff I kind of recognized barged in on our conversation to roar, "MISTER GAVIN, SIR!! WHY ARE YOU IN THE DEFENSE LOBBY, SIR?! A TERRIBLE BREACH OF PROTOCOL, SIR, PLEASE RETURN TO THE COURTROOM IMMEDIATELY!!!"

"Ah…yes, my apologies…" Klavier winced. I noticed his hands twitching, like he was trying to refrain from shielding his ears. I didn't blame him; I just wondered why he was talking so quietly.

"Fraulein? Fraulein, are you alright?"

"Oh, I'm just peachy, stupid Fop. What about you?"

He blinked in surprise and continued whispering. "I am fine, thank you. Why do you ask?"

"Because you're talking really quietly and it's annoying me!"

His wide blue eyes reflected confusion briefly, then he laughed out loud. As melodious and soft as it was, it bothered me, because I had a feeling he was laughing at _me._

"Perhaps Fraulein's hearing would improve if Fraulein removed her hands from her ears?" he suggested through a fit of chuckles.

_Oh, _no _way…_ I wrenched my hands down from my ears where they'd been almost glued (I can't even begin to tell you how loud that Mike guy was, that's my excuse) to glare severely at him, cheeks burning. "I knew that!"

"Oh ja, of course."

"I was testing you!"

"And did I pass?"

"S-stupid fop! You failed! Failed, do you hear me? …Man, I need Snackoos…" I rummaged in my messenger bag and managed to find a bag of my delicious snacks. Ripping it open, I popped a few into my mouth. CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH.

Klavier hummed innocently and rocked back and forth on his heels. Trucy and Apollo, along with their client, had edged away from us, and Machi seemed perfectly content to mutter random English phrases to himself. Maybe he was practicing or something?

"I am not the shooting! Your face is the shooting! Your mother is the shooting!"

_…I wonder what television programs he's been watching lately._

Suddenly something occurred to me. I Snackoo'd Klavier (solely to get his attention, of course). "Hey, fop, how come _you're_ the translator for a witness for the _defense_? You're the prosecutor!"

"Yes, but I do know enough Borginian to get by. Borginian is not exactly a common language, you know, so I was the best translator they could come by on such short notice."

"Huh. Wait, aren't translators usually, oh, _fluent?_ I think you'll need to know more than enough to 'get by', he's hardly going to testify about where the bathroom is!"

"I…must concede to you on that. On no accounts do I expect him to testify about the restroom."

"Then what use are you?"

"You _wanted _him to testify about the restroom? My, Fraulein, I had thought you were-"

"Huh? _Ugh, _no, I meant that it's the first thing you learn in a language, right? 'Where's the bathroom'?"

"Ah, it is just down the hall."

"No, I wasn't asking you, I was explaining!"

"You don't need to explain. I know where the bathroom is."

"I was explaining about your uselessness as a translator," I ground out. "No one cares about the bathroom!"

"Then it's hardly a problem if Machi doesn't testify about it, ja? If that's the only objection you have, then it's time to rock!"

_Sorry, Logic. I tried._

"There are MUNCH _so_ many things MUNCH MUNCH wrong with this," I muttered unhappily, quashing the urge to use a Snackoo as a murder weapon and instead following my foppish boss into the courtroom. As the door slammed shut behind us, he stopped suddenly, forcing me to walk right into him.

"Hey, you can't just stop whenever you feel like it!" _Stupid fop! Stupid…amazing-smelling…fop!_

"Fraulein." He leaned back and whispered softly into my ear, "You do realize that I understand, ja? I'm just a mouthpiece- here to give Machi some confidence in his English. I doubt I'll end up needing to translate anything at all."

Then just as suddenly his warm breath was gone from my cheek as he leaned forward and whispered something to Machi, who had been looking a little puzzled and a lot adorable. When he heard what my boss had to say (something stupid, no doubt), he started nodding away like some kind of broken bobblehead. Why couldn't Klavier be that cute? If he was that kind of cute I would just want to hug him and maybe dress him up like a teddy bear or something.

But Klavier was not a teddy bear kind of cute. He was a rock god kind of cute. He was a hot kind of cute. He was a fop kind of cute, and suddenly I remembered my stupid dream all too clearly. _Nightmare,_ I corrected myself. _Nightmare, my nightmare. Nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare…_

As we parted ways so I could head to the witness prep room, he snatched my Snackoos out of my hands with a wink.

"HEEEEY!"

There was the bang of a gavel. "No shouting in the courtroom! Lover's spats get a room!"

"We're not-" I started to protest angrily, but suddenly a crunchy snack was rudely shoved into my mouth. "Looerrgtth!" It's really hard to shout through a snackoo, so I devoured it quickly. CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH. "What was that for?!"

"A last 'delicious' snack to sustain you. Now, off to the prep room, Fraulein! I won't eat them, ugh, I would just like to avoid a murder during my concert!"

"You mean trial," I called triumphantly over my shoulder. Ha, got him! That was a scientific _mistake._

He smirked.

* * *

Let's not talk about the trial.

Please.

It should be enough to say that that Fop made a fool of me as usual, that stupid dream was looming over my thoughts the entire time, and I never did get my Snackoos back.

You wouldn't want to murder someone you were in love with, right? The defense rests.

"Ah! Fraulein! Wait!"

"No way, glimmerous Fop," I muttered angrily, kicking some footprints in the thin layer of ice on the sidewalk as I quickened my pace. Of course it couldn't snow. Ice. We got slippery, slimy, good-for-nothing ice.

Reminded me of someone, actually…

"Fraulein, please-"

"No!"

"But Fraulein, please, your Snackoos-"

I spun around on my heel, ripped the bag out of his hands, and glared at him. "No 'please'! This is why I hate my job, you know. It's because of _you!_"

He looked more mournful than ever. "Do you really mean that, Ema?"

Did I feel my heart jerk a little when he said my name? No, definitely not. Definitely….probably. Maybe. I hope. "I think I prefer Fraulein," I said. "And yes, I really absolutely definitely mean it!" Probably.

A small, ominous smile grew on his face. "Oh really? Are you sure that your supposed 'hate' is not just a cover for your love?"

"Love? For my job? No way!" I snorted.

"Not at all, Fraulein- love for _me._"

_Thank you for calling Ema's Brain. I'm afraid I've stepped out for the moment, please try again later. You may leave a message at the tone…_

"Wh- No- that's- MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH!" I crammed a handful of Snackoos into my mouth to distract myself from the awful burning feeling in my cheeks. He'd made a fool out of me again, damn him! "Shhopid fob! Uuur alwaysh sho shtuck-up an' annoyinn! I hade mai jhob becaaush ov you! Ha, ish dat good enub foor you? Ish dat good enub? Thiish caysh of "lub" ish shettled!"

Klavier spent a moment translating this in his head, yet when he'd had time for it to sink in he still seemed strangely unperturbed. "You know, in order for a case to be settled, there must be a courtroom," he said nonchalantly.

I thought about this for several seconds (and swallowed) before agreeing suspiciously. "Yeah. So?"

"In order for this case of Fraulein's love to be decided, there must be a courtroom of sorts-"

"Oh no, no way, way off base, you are _not_ taking this to a courtroom!"

"Er, I was speaking metaphorically, Fraulein. I meant a courtroom as in a setting which will allow each of us to present our cases."

"Huh. Shockingly, that actually sounds reasonable."

He beamed as he put a leg over his motorbike (I hadn't realized we were walking toward it, I was so into arguing). "Excellent! Then I'll pick you up in front of the precinct at six for the concert!"

"Huh? Hey wait, that's not what I-" But it was too late. He'd already roared away.

MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH. Okay, Ema, calm down. It's just a concert with that fop. He'll probably even put me on Security again, just to drive me nuts.

Just a concert.

Just a concert.

I glanced my cell phone's little clock. "Just how slowly are you planning to go?" I snapped at it before realizing it was an inanimate object and could not respond. I sighed.

Just a concert.

I wondered vaguely if I would survive the next four hours without going insane.

From irritation with Klavier, I mean.

Yeah.

"What am I going to wear?!"


End file.
